chocopie scam

The Center of the Weird Side has a most important announcement for its millions of readers worldwide.

Our researchers have toiled night and day- the result is astounding as well as it is astonishing. The have dug out a deep rooted conspiracy. Something so large .. so overwhelming that not just the the mind boggles.. it woggles foggles and soggles as well.

What you are about to hear might change your life forever.. so be calm.. be composed.. children and elder citizens and those with heart conditions are advised use discretion while continuing to read.

*dramatic pause*

The Lotto Chocopie is a big scam. Yes ladies and gentlemen this is a fact. It may be a truth too harsh to contemplate. You may bite your finger and curse at this terrible turn of events. but it is only too true.

On the cover a marshmallow center is not just promised there is a long standing convention of one actually being present.

The promised Marshmallow Center

Now suddenly over the past few months there is no marshmallow at the center. Instead there is a thin layer of a somewhat-brown caramel. It's horrible.

This is greatest form of treachery. be careful of it. you have been warned.

india's best cricketer

We have been studying the case of which player is the best in the Indian Cricket Team.

Certain people make very strong cases:

1. Mahendra/MSD/Mahi Re etc:

His captaincy has been a revelation. He's the kind of rare player, much rarer Indian player, who relished responsibility. he seems to like leading from the front and this spurs him onto better performances.

But no it is not him.

2. Sachin/ Tendlia etc:

Has been scoring prolific 90's. but no it is not him either.

3. Zaheer Khan:

This guy is a bloody good bowler. Our studies have shown that Allah is the most merciful, most benefical ..for.. bowlers. Communal jokes apart.. he has shouldered the responsibility of the bowling attack with great aplomb.

We also studied the cases of Harbhajan Singh, Robin Uthappa, Anil Kumble (special mention). Heck we even studied Sourav Ganguly's nomination.

But the maths just adds up to one thing. India's best player is:

Misbah-ul-Huq.

In case you are wondering whether he plays for the ICL you are mistaken. Actually he plays for Pakistan.

Mishbah ul Huq is such a tragic character the deserves to be either a Shakespearen Moore or a member of the Indian Cricket Team. Perhaps his abilities and achievements are proof of the genetic affinity of people in the sub-continent...

I have seen him lose at least two matches, one not in the least the final of the twenty-twenty world cup with the same shot. We now call the holing out to short fine leg when attempting the 'lappa' the Misbah special.

Aah! the sheer joy of seeing a guy on another team choke with such amazing regularity is such sweet succor to a Sourav Ganguly fan. The only equivalent joy is watching South Africa in crunch matches.

But here's the part which has the Mullah's beard in a twist: if it weren't for Misbah they would have not come close to winning and lost, but be thrashed.

but the lingering feeling of so close, yet so far.. its..its like softcore porn.

One's hearts must go out to Pakistanis to have them messed with like this. But then again.. they're a Dictatorship and who cares? not me.

Today i watched Misbah miss out on a century in what could have gone down as one of the finest innings played by a Pakistani batsman on Indian soil by .. JUMPING IN THE AIR while in the crease to avoid being hit by the throw.

the inanity, the tragedy, the comedy, the disbelief..the relief.. this could so easily be an Indian.. the joy .. all this is happening to Pakistan.. AGAIN!

The best part is that he can't be vilified like Taslim Nasreen because again.. they only are in the game because of the guy.

Ah! Pakistan.. my heart goes out to you..

then again.. it is a dictatorship and who cares?

not me.